Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Don't trust me with your secrets.
Seriously, don't. I've discovered that I can't hold up under torture. Not at all. How did I find this out? The day after I had my wisdom teeth removed, I suffered a side effect from the anesthesia, which caused me to have hiccups. Oh, I don't mean your garden variety hiccups, not something so nice. For two straight days, all day long, whenever I swallowed any food or drink, it would trigger an "attack" of loud, sustained hiccups, that I could only sometimes stop when I held my breath until I nearly passed out. This only sometimes stopped the hiccups, but I was usually able to stop them after three or four tries, which would last until I swallowed again. This kept up for two straight days, broken only by the sleep that I was able to induce with the painkillers I had been given. I was a total bitch to my wife about it, as after a while it was driving me a bit mad. It was sort of like being subjected to the "Chinese Water Torture", but self inflicted, and internal. I was worried that it was being caused by my painkillers or antibiotic, but it turns out that it was a side effect of the anesthesia, and that to get past it all I had to do was to drink a couple of liters of water, and wait. It worked! But now I know myself a bit better, and I will once again warn you that I can't be trusted with secrets. Nor do I suspect that many people could. I would literally have told you anything, true, false or really really false, to have stopped the hiccups. But, then again, maybe I'm lying. Don't torture me to find out.